my "WOAH" moment with God

So many of you know the story of my home life but if you don't I'll lay it out for you:

I am from a shattered home. It's not broken because it's so far gone and past that. My mom currently lives with her boyfriend who blantly hates me and lets everyone know it. My brother and his girlfriend and their three kids live in a two bedroom trailer with my sister and her 3 year old. We all went to church together when i was in junior high. Unfortunately our family has been through a lot and i was the only stubborn one to see it through. I decided to grab a hold of God and everyone else decided to pack it up and run from God.

So during spring break i was sitting in Mexico people watching to discover that they had something i didn't- a close family unit. I want that so badly. All i wanted to do was to go home and serve my family. To serve them with no questions asked because it's what i love to do. So i decided that for Easter break i was not going to sit in my apartment and catch up on homework or get a head start on final projects but i would go home. My mom was thrilled at the news and supprisingly my brother even offered to pick me up, surprising because usually his response is to ask if i can pitch in for gas which i never mind doing. He's just so excited that i'm coming home i guess. Well for the last few Sundays God has been breaking my heart for my family.

In church i was talking to God before partaking in communion. We had the following conversation, this is the Kris Locker version of course!

He was breaking me for my family and i asked, "God how can you expect me to minister to people in other countries if i cannot even shed light to my family" and God in his strong and loving voice said, "Seriously Kris? Let me ask you this: what is a missions field?" I answered "Somewhere that needs the saving message of Christ. WOAH." God replied "Yep, you finally are getting it" I started to cry and said "You mean my missions field IS home? All this time i've wondered if i wanted to go into missions and there it was right in front of me. I think this is the one time when the missionary actually started going to chruch as the same time as those in their mission field"

So although it's something I've known, it was revealed to me again. My family is my mission field. I have invested in their lives and love them so deeply. They will always be my mission field regardless of where i am or what i'm doing. I have a tie to them and will continue to serve them and be their light until the day they too hear from God and decide to listen.

we serve such an amazing God!