giving up...

Don't worry friends, i know the title can sound negative but this is a good thing. Earlier this week i was praying and talking to God and i gave up the rest of my year to him to do what he wants. I'm done worrying about everything from relationships, to ministries, to classes. I'm not saying that i'm gonna climb into bed and show up to Graduation in May but that i'm not going to constantly worry about if this friends is feel neglected, if this boy likes me or what will happen if the professor didn't like my paper. I am going to put myself into everything i do as i usually do but my life is in HIS hands and i don't need to mess with it. I am going to wait and see what God does with it. He is much better at handling my life's craziness so i'll let him do it again! :0)

I was watching a t.v. show the other day and it filled me with so much emotion. I'm not one to watch t.v. but i had some downtime (miracle!!!) and found a show about millionaires who for a week live like they are poor. They have to make rent, buy food and they leave with only $150. They meet people just barely making ends meet and decide how to give a lot of money and how much to give to whom. They met a little girl who had cancer and her family had no insurance. I have never gotten so emotional watching a show but i was just crying. I composed myself and then at the end of the show the father and son millionaire pair handed the dad of the little girl a check for "50,000" and he started crying and by this time i was bawling my eyes out. It was sad and happy at the same time. Then at the end of the show they went back to their millionaire ways and raving about how much it changed them. I got angry and thought to myself, "How can you go back to your 10 Mil mansion when you know the needs out there? How can you back to that?" I know i couldn't. But i do. I'm a privileged college student. I'm still processing it.

one last thing: i was talking to a guy friend the other day and like most convos with this guy we started talking about relationships and he said that he surveyed a lot of college-age guys and the top two things they look for in a girl was: humor and modest. I found this interesting.

Kris