I have many things to update on. I have been learning oh so much lately. I don't know why but whenever i am at camp i don't only hear from God but i feel like he's in a loud and booming voice and the minute i go home or away and it's a faint whisper and i need to search him out. I love it here.
God is teaching me to let go. There is something i was sure i was ready for in my life and God told me no for a few months and i constantly was trying to prove how i could handle it. Eventually i gave in to his answer and am seeing how weak without him. Although this thing felt so right i was told no and i have to let it go and move on. As soon as i gave it up i was convicted of the men in my life and how i act around them and set up boundries for my emotions and for appearances of evil. So, if you are a close male friend in my life and it seems like i'm pulling away or acting strange it's because i am. I'm guarding myself and serving my husband. God and i spent a few nights chatting and diving into his words about pure living and being a light of his. My husband deserves all of my heart, whenever/if ever i meet him, i don't want to give him whatever is left of my heart. It's something i feel very strongly about. And so does Jesus.
I am being called to be a SMT Coordinator once again. I remember telling God that i would do anything at camp but i didn't feel comfortable working with high schoolers. Even as a counselor i volunteered for specialty camps senior high week. Well two years ago i volunteered *sign?* to help D Wag with the program and then when he got sick and hospitalized it feel upon my lap and last year Mike and I headed it up together. God is hilarious with my comfort zone. Well he recently told me he wants me to return and i told him that i will go where he calls and that i will trust him to bring the person to help with the program. (having talked to Mike who said he was done with camp) Then this weekend Mike told me during the meeting -where i got caught for talking- that he was going to come back for the summer. God is so good.
Okay so to the teaching thing. On Friday i said goodbye to my second grade class and it was a bit sad but a part of me was ready to move on. Today with great excitement and equally nervousness: I walked into a elementary special edu room. I have to tell you i absolutely loved every minutes of it. If that isn't a sign that it's what i was put on this earth to do...i don't know what is. I light up when working with a struggling student. I love hearing them reading and helping them out. I love it, love it, LOVE IT! Not to say i didn't like my second grade room but this is what i've studied for the last four years and what my passion lies. I seriously loved it. I got to go into a few classrooms to help out during reading times or those who missed their recess to do their missing work. I love that too. Oh and my teacher is amazing. He is laid back and so much fun. He plays with the kids and they respect him so much. We are planning on sledding party for my goodbye party and the kids have to earn it by learning 12-13 spelling lists which is part of their goals for the year. The kids were so psyched about it and it'll be great to have them out at camp experiencing the tubing hill :0)
How's that for an update?
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